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Thread: Washed and Waiting: the story of a gay Christian

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    Washed and Waiting: the story of a gay Christian

    What is it like to be a Christian who believes the Bible’s teaching that homosexual activity is a sin and who realizes that he is sexually attracted to others of his sex? Wesley Hill knows the answer to that question. He decided that the only way he could be obedient to the Bible was to live a life of celibacy. He has written a book called Washed and Waiting in which he describes his experiences. Here is what he says about his reasons for writing the book.

    When I began to wrestle with my homosexuality in a serious way, I was a Christian and a committed church member. The first people with whom I wanted to talk about my experience of same-sex desires were the pastors and elders at my church. Compassionate and understanding people that they were, these leaders looked for books and resources to help me grapple with what I was facing.

    Disappointingly, however, we all came up short. There just didn’t seem to be any books we could find that described what it felt like to wrestle with homosexuality from the inside, as it were—as a Christian. There were plenty of books that talked about the causes and the results of homosexuality in individuals and families. There were also lots of books that talked about the “culture wars” and the relevant biblical passages and the governmental legislation about homosexuality and marriage. But, unfortunately, it was hard to find a personal, pastoral book that said, “Here is what it looks like to be a Christian and experience the reality of homosexuality firsthand. Here is my story…”

    That’s why I wrote my book—to describe, primarily for celibate gay Christians themselves, my experience of homosexual desires and my commitment to Christianity’s traditional position that sex is intended to be experienced only within marriage between a man and a woman. I wanted to assure gay Christians, many of whom remain deeply committed to Scripture, that their struggles—with the “why” questions, with loneliness, shame, and the hunger for love—are shared by many in the church. I wanted gay Christians to realize they aren’t alone as they seek, in their own way, to “grow up into Christ” (Ephesians 4:15) along with the rest of their fellow Christians.

    My hope is that this book will help pastors better understand what it looks and feels like to be a Christian facing the reality of one’s own broken sexuality. The result, I hope, will be a greater sensitivity to one another’s weaknesses, and a deeper commitment to “bear one another’s burdens” (Galatians 6:2) in the fellowship of Christ’s Body.

    In addition to telling the story of his own life he tells us something about the lives of Henri Nouwen and Gerard Manley Hopkins, who both faced the same problem and found the same solution to it.

    There are three groups of people who would be helped by reading this book.

    The first is Christians who face the same temptation that Hill does. They will find that they aren’t alone and that like any other Christian they can rely on God’s promise in 1 Corinthians 10:13,

    No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.

    The second group is Christians who want to understand homosexuality better so they will know how to help those who are facing this problem.

    And finally the book will also help nonChristians understand what the Bible really teaches about this subject.

    There is a wide range of attitudes toward homosexuality on the part of professing Christians. At one extreme there are groups like the Westboro Baptist Church who condemn anyone who is tempted in this area even if he never gives in the the temptation and at the other are churches who encourage homosexuals to follow their impulses and who never warn them that what they are doing is wrong. The Bible teaches that we should avoid both these extremes and this book gives practical advice on how to do this.

    Wesley Hill is also an editor and contributor to this blog:

    http://spiritualfriendship.org/
    I do not suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it.
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    Nihongo dame desu villanelle's Avatar
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    Um... okay. Do you get a cut or something?

    I feel sorry for this guy. His culture tells him that he is "broken", in his own words, simple based on something as benign as for whom he feel an attraction. I can't imagine how painful that must be. I hope he find peace and acceptance.

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    Let's take a trip to the stars Steffy's Avatar
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    Disgusting. I hope he can find it within himself to break away from such damaging ideas.

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    Ellaria Niobe's Avatar
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    What a twisted and depressing view of human sexuality.
    I solemnly swear the words in this post are mine own, and not the work of any third party, corporeal or otherwise, unless they are quoted with citation.

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    Moderator purplekitty's Avatar
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    Not all Christians believe homosexuality is a sin. Not even all pastors. They don't consider homosexual feelings "a problem," so no, this book isn't helpful to those people.

    And frankly, this --->

    No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.
    Is such a load of bullshit. there are people who kill themselves every day because they aren't able to cope. Some of those people are homosexuals because of Christians who tell them choosing to have a healthy, happy relationship with someone they love is sinful and instead they should be abstinent.

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    Full Sponsor Fanny's Avatar
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    Blah blah blah blah same old freaking blah.

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    Quote Originally Posted by villanelle View Post
    I feel sorry for this guy. His culture tells him that he is "broken", in his own words, simple based on something as benign as for whom he feel an attraction. I can't imagine how painful that must be. I hope he find peace and acceptance.
    His beliefs aren't based on what his culture has told him but on what God tells him through the Bible. If you read the book I think you will find that he has found peace and acceptance. You can find out something about what the thinks and how he feels by reading his posts on the blog I linked to.

    Quote Originally Posted by purplekitty View Post
    No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure.
    Is such a load of bullshit. there are people who kill themselves every day because they aren't able to cope.
    This promise is directed to Christians. If you repent and believe in Christ God will not only forgive your sins but give you the power to live a holy life and resist future temptations to sin.
    I do not suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it.
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    Ellaria Niobe's Avatar
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    Coming to peace with being broken, when you are absolutely nothing of the sort, is a hideously depressing concept.
    I solemnly swear the words in this post are mine own, and not the work of any third party, corporeal or otherwise, unless they are quoted with citation.

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    Moderator purplekitty's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by puddleglum View Post
    This promise is directed to Christians. If you repent and believe in Christ God will not only forgive your sins but give you the power to live a holy life and resist future temptations to sin.
    I was a Christian for 40 years. I'm well aware of what being a Christian means. My point still stands. Christians kill themselves every single day because they can't cope. My father was one of the most devout people I knew and he completed suicide. So your statement is a total load of bullshit. Your god DOES give people more than they can handle.

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    Nihongo dame desu villanelle's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by puddleglum View Post
    His beliefs aren't based on what his culture has told him but on what God tells him through the Bible. If you read the book I think you will find that he has found peace and acceptance. You can find out something about what the thinks and how he feels by reading his posts on the blog I linked to.


    This promise is directed to Christians. If you repent and believe in Christ God will not only forgive your sins but give you the power to live a holy life and resist future temptations to sin.
    His religion is part of his culture. That's why I used that term. And I don't think that accepting oneself as "broken" is true peace or acceptance.

    There isn't a chance in hell I will read this book because I don't want a penny of mine going to support this sort of mentality. Even if it is free, I don't want to give a single click through to anything that supports this sort of thing. I find it disgusting.

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